This often the initial reaction we get from people when we first mention the idea of collaborative law and whether it could be right for them.<\/p>\n
And it\u2019s perfectly understandable. You\u2019ve separated from your husband, wife or partner. Emotions are running high. It\u2019s an incredibly difficult time, and the thought of being in the same room as your ex \u2013 let alone discussing your future, your children and your finances with them \u2013 can be hard to take.<\/p>\n
However you go about it, the process of unravelling connected lives is not an easy one. But, for many people – and for a number of different reasons – the \u2018traditional\u2019 court process may not be the best approach for everyone.<\/p>\n
Collaborative family law gives you an alternative. The concept is relatively straightforward: you and your ex each appoint a lawyer and the four of you discuss, together, in a series of \u2018four-way\u2019 meetings, the issues surrounding your separation with a view to reaching agreement. All without setting foot in court. The only court involvement is when the agreement you have reached together is presented to a judge to rule on \u2013 and you don\u2019t need to be there when that happens.<\/p>\n
It sounds simple. And, for some people, it can be. But we understand that everyone\u2019s circumstances are different, and there is no \u2018one size fits all\u2019 approach to resolving issues when couples separate. Our role is to help you find the approach that best suits you and your family situation.<\/p>\n
Cutting out the middleman<\/strong><\/p>\n Divorce lawyers are often criticised for fanning the flames of acrimony, and certainly the chain of events required for you to communicate with your ex in the \u2018traditional\u2019 divorce process does nothing to help this. You ask a relatively simple question via your solicitor, who passes it to your ex\u2019s solicitor, who passes it to your ex \u2013 and the response comes back along the chain, sometimes taking days or even weeks.<\/p>\n Picture instead the opportunity to have that discussion face to face, around a table, knowing that you each have your lawyer by your side to advise and guide you. You\u2019ll get instant feedback and the opportunity to discuss and resolve things between you there and then, speeding up the process and minimising the damage that Chinese whispers can cause. Discussing things face to face means that there is far less scope for misinterpretation and misunderstanding and, although those discussions can be difficult at times, people who have been through the collaborative process say it is well worth it.<\/p>\n